2006-01-19 - 10:51 a.m.

Mind Muddle

This whole alternate reality thing seems to continue. I was in California over the weekend. Somehow, G is now the most present person in my life although he lives so very far away. Our ability to spend so much time together in the past month, talking on the phone every day, makes this all feel rather present.
As soon as I got back to New York, I bought my ticket for February. G will be here in March.
I have a terrible cold so, although I've been at work, I have been just coming home, reading and going to bed very early. This morning, I woke up before 5am, read, took a shower, get ready for work, and just called in sick because I couldn't stand to think of getting anything done when I am so out of it.
I haven't seen any of my friends, although I have plans to see Erinne on Sunday. My father will be in town tomorrow.
I'm not sure what to make of my state of mind this week. It isn't depression so much as exhastion and an inability to control my mind. I wonder how it is that everyone else around me seems to be able to live a normal life regardless of what happens. I am young and generally healthy so why does a cold keep my mind in such a muddle?

�

yesterday tomorrow

< ? diary of a feminist ! >